VULNERABILITY

The dictionary describes "vulnerability" as "susceptible of being hurt" and "open to criticism". At first glance, this might sound like a bad thing. I view vulnerability as a good thing.

In my last blog, I talked about my fear of flying. In order to conquer that fear (which I did on March 10 and 14, 2010 when I traveled to and from Kentucky--2 days/6 flights!!!!!!) (and the fear was quite debilitating), I needed to make myself vulnerable. I was open to not only the possibility of being physically hurt and I suppose emotionally hurt as well, but I was also open to criticism by others because of that fear. I heard alot of comments that "flying is no big deal" and "you'll be fine", etc. Unless you walk in someone else's shoes (or quake in someone else's boots, as the case may be), you do not truly appreciate what that person's fear does to them. I took a leap of faith and confronted my fear head-on. I am so glad I did!

I learned that opening myself up to new things and confronting old monsters is so liberating. I now know that no matter how vulnerable I may feel, I am extremely resilient. My move from South Dakota to Kentucky in May (completely uprooting and going to the unknown) is just another example of becoming vulnerable. I do not fear vulnerability. I view this as a necessary part of living--I mean truly living--not just putting one foot in front of the other, muddling through life--but being a willing participant in my life.

Conquering my fear of flying and allowing myself to be vulnerable to all of the possibilities that life has in store for me is the greatest feeling. I am truly liberated and open to all things new and different. I feel ALIVE!